Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Randomize
