I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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