Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
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