I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Randomize
