Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
