just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
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