This dress was meant to end up on your floor
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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