he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
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