Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Randomize
