just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize