my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Randomize
