At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize