She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
