yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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