I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
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