He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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