You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
My legs feel like baby dolphins
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
