Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
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