She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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