I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
