I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Success! We fucked roommates!
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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