Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Randomize
