Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Randomize
