So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Randomize
