and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Randomize
