Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
