I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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