a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
Randomize
