all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Randomize