I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Oh god it's open bar.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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