To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
Randomize
