who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
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