dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize