We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize
