Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
Randomize
