Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I left my keys in the garlic bread freezer in Publix.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
they're like a gay fantastic four
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
Randomize
