It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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