I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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