So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Randomize
