You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
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