Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize