I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
