the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Randomize
