ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize
