Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
the day after is always just damage control
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Randomize
