Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
Randomize
