Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
