she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
