But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Randomize
