I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
