Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
